thursday 31st march, 2005


simpletext says this document is too large to accept any more text. so anything i have to say will have to wait until tomorrow when it becomes april. meh!

wednesday 30th march, 2005


OK, here's an actual picture of our kitty:


too bad you can't see her adorable face but she's getting bolder day by day and soon we'll be able to have her posing properly! since i am home most of the day she has warmed up to me alot, but still gives the occasional warning slap or hiss to let me know i'm still on probation. we can get her to play and she loves running up & down our hallway. which is good, cos as you can see from the photo of her looking out the bedroom window she is HELLA FAT! her last owners apparently gave her lots of treats and table snacks. lucky likes to roll around on her back on the carpet in the lounge and that's when you can really see her big chubby white tummy. i even got her to come to me when i came back from the gym just now, she came trotting up like a little doggy. since she has such substantial mass, you can really hear her footfalls as she pads across the floor. unfortunately i discovered today that she's been clawing the back of our £30 ghetto sofa instead of her scratching post so more aggressive measures will be taken before the arrival of our really posh sofa in a couple more weeks. here is a pic of it, the room it's in here even looks like ours a little bit which is spooky.



i have a temp gig starting friday, only 20 hours a week but it's right in the neighborhood and it's at city college so i prolly won't have to dress like a complete tosser for this one. then next week i have an interview to office-manage an office that's closing at the end of the year, so it's an 8-month contract (literally 3 blocks from our flat) only but for really good money so if i get it some socking-away will occur, jah as my witness.

next month's design could potentially cause seizures so i'm warning yas ahead of time. i re-coded the flash page, it's a better layout i think. have you been? go waste some bandwidth, we got same wacky and thoroughly meaningless stuph on there.

that's all for now, time to wash off the stank of the prince regent swim complex. phew!

wednesday 23rd march, 2005


LUCKY IS HERE!


that is not actually lucky, but i think this is what she looks like. after a skittish little sniff around the bathroom & kitchen she went under the bed and i haven't seen her since. the man who brought her said she will come out at night and investigate (as they do). so, yay! i hope she settles in nicely and soon enough we will have real pictures to post. she's had the name "lucky" for all four of her years now and if it were up to me i'd change it. so, hurray! here is a page of beautiful black and white cats for all to enjoy. lots of azor & ozzy lookalikes on there. OK back to watching mildred pierce, and listening for signs of life from the back of the flat. again, hurray!

tuesday 22nd march, 2005


cat update: the man from lostcats was going to bring the little female cat (also black & white and very shy, which sounds scarily like ozzy) around this afternoon straight from her current home but she's gone into freakout mode and they can not get her into the carrier. poor thing! she even slashed his hand pretty bad, he tells me. i feel so bad for this little cat; first her mummy disappears (dies), then all the stuff in the house starts disappearing, and now some strange guy and her daddy (who is wheelchair-bound) are trying to stuff her in a cage. i wish there was some way to communicate to her that there is a good, loving home waiting for her with me & derry. i've been told she's only 4 years old, and wasn't exactly a lap cat but more or less comes and goes as she pleases but when she wants to sit on you she will. sounds more and more like ozzy and it's bugging me out a little. so they're gonna wait for the old man's daughter to come around this evening & try again. the guy asked me if i still wanted her after hearing all this & i said "of course, now more than ever!" if she does go to the holding pen she will be very anti-social and no one will adopt her ever. she needs us! and i'm told she likes peppermints. so i'm sitting here, waiting for 'the call'.

and now for the good / bad news: Final British GM trial confirms threat to wildlife. well, most of us have been saying 'uh, duh' for a long time but this could be the last straw for the growth of GM crops in the UK, BUT... EU Commission to continue introducing GM products amid opposition. confused? who wouldn't be. so basically, we won't grow 'em in the UK but since no member states of the EU have been vocal enough about an outright ban (other than activist groups), brussels will decide it's OK to import and encourage production of same elsewhere. even though 70% of europeans are against them, it's tough shit sugar. make that, tough shit GM-modified sugar. i will be organic until the day i die, so cross-pollination withstanding (knock wood-look veneer) i shouldn't mutate.

why do the songs on 'a rush of blood to the head' make me spontaneously weep? why?

a lovely golden field for me and you and you and you

monday 21st march, 2005


that is a thoroughly uninspired caption.

looks like we may be getting a kitty, finally! i've been in contact with a bloke from lostcatsbrighton and wednesday we are going to see a cat whose elderly owner has had to give him up since he was recently widowed and is moving into a care home. sad! so even if the cat is old and somewhat manky, he/she needs people to take him/her in and provide a nice retirement home and lots of love. i owe the universe since i was lucky enough to find someone to adopt little ozzy - something i simply can't and won't talk about. it still makes me cry when i think about it...

anyway, on to wackier news: i saw nick cave at the organic cafe with his kids today! he seems to be a very good daddy - he talks to the children (twins i think, about 4 maybe?) like they are adults and they respond in turn. they seem to know what 'caffeine' is which impressed me. so i walked into the cafe (no names, please) looking like an absolute minger cos i had just come from the gym and our eyes met. i didn't stare or go all goopy or slack-jawed cos i'm used to hanging out with musicians and people i admire who are famous, it was just a totally cool moment. nor did i go into my well-rehearsed-in-my-mind-for-two-decades-now opener; "we met at danceteria in NYC in 1984 wasted drunk at about 3am" speech cos like i said, i was absolutely minging from working out and i am a) happily married, and b) not looking to shmooze my way into a band or a scene or anything at present. man, have i grown up or what? a few years ago i would have been all over him like white on rice, but instead i was just 'whatever' casual and like, yeah i'll prolly see him around (the cave tribe live in hove) anyway... so it was just cool. for those of you who don't know, i used to be birthday party fan no. 1, was often compared to roland s. howard guitar-wise (when i first started playing), and even used to wear my hair like nick used to back in the day (thinking it would give me magical powers or something? who the fuck knows). so nick, if you're bored and google your name one night, you will find this blog page and know that the 4-eyed pony-tailed minger in the organic cafe was yours truly. and i might as well throw this in for old times sake: i am a guitarist and bassist who sings and blah de blah blah blah... GAAAAHHH i just don't have the will anymore!

off to argos to buy kitty stuff! yay! but first, a frickin' shower.

oh, me and suey watched a mighty wind yesterday and laughed our asses off! parker posey almost made me lose it... and harry shearer (aka mark shubb) is just genius with his subtlety and timing. go see it!

friday 18th march, 2005


blargh... i'm looking for work during the day so most of my bandwidth is occupied with that drab little chore. I did get to see the new brighton jubilee library yesterday, which is an eco-conscious structure and quite striking. it's also a PFI (private finance initiative) deal worked out with the brighton & hove council, something i personally am very wary about, if you'd like to know why read this. i do plan on getting a membership today... as well as (yawn) registering with another temp agency (that will make 5 now) and practicing my audio typing. speaking of which, i better start Capitalising on here cos i noticed it makes me screw up at work. oh jeebus! i suck! so boring! arnt!

they're giving away free organic flower seed packets at the royal pavillion today, which is nice, maybe i'll pick one up & start a window box.

still boring! try again!

here's exciting news: cut tag to my neocon mini-rant from 18 march, 2005.

aw jeez i've gone to The Dark Place. rassa fracka bricka bracka. i better upload this drivel and walk amongst the living. where's lawrence llewelyn-bowen (flash alert) with my doppio macchiato?

friday 11th march, 2005


now that the ipod shuffle has hit the streets, every slackjawed faux hipster in strafing range is plugged in to those clinical-white lifelines... and would *someone* please point out to these slaves to dime-store technology that those lame-ass bud earphones are SUCH CHEAP PIECES OF SHIT that we can hear every painful squeal of joss stone or whatever the fuck you're listening to as you stare gormlessly at sweetie chick on your mobile? i still wear my huge can headphones and no one has a clue what i'm listening to or what i'm doing and I LIKE IT THAT WAY. and i listen to CDs (mostly burns) on a battered sony discman i procured about 5 years ago AND I LIKE IT THAT WAY.

today was my last day in lewes, and i've noticed that the first thing i do to celebrate, well, pretty much everything, is get a giant cappucino w/a hazelnut syrup shot in it and wander the streets staring at the sky... yes like a drooling retard... i can't explain the endorphin rush it creates, it's as good as the gym without the sweat (more on that later). anyway, today as i stumbled down (literally down cos it is a pretty severe incline) the lewes high street, enjoying my first breaths of council-free freedom, i took a gigundous sip of molten lava masquerading as cappucino and out of fear of soldering my throat shut permanently, i held it in my mouth instead of swallowing. for what seemed like an eternity. my organic california merlot feels like it's running over rough pebbles straight into my gut. la dolce vita indeed!

guess what? kaiser chiefs kick ass. i don't care if they're huge; sometimes good stuff is popular. it's true! they sound like every band i ever liked. and what the fuck is wrong with that? put on some pants and fight me, i dare ya! bring it!

thursday 10th march, 2005


my last post is kind of mean. hopefully i'm not inviting bad karma but sometimes i just wanna run my mouth and better to do it here than to everyone i know in person. i'm sorry i think my poor neighbors who got robbed are kind of thick, but they have enough money to BUY their own flat, so why wouldn't they protect their investment(s) with another lock on their door? i just don't get it. they're young; it's not like they come from 'an earlier, simpler time' or anything...

people frighten and confuse me. this is my sounding board. fuck it.

wednesday 9th march, 2005


i didn't mention our building got broken into, did i? it happened last saturday in the middle of the afternoon. we went out to get my special hangover giant veggie burger at wai kika moo kau, and when we got back some weird guy was coming down the stairs in front of our 3rd floor neighbor (we live on the ground floor). as soon as he saw us, his eyes bugged out tex avery-style (a-OOOO-gah!) and he covered his mouth & began coughing *violently* and very wetly like someone who has raging tuberculosis... it was comically exaggerated, a totally bizarre moment... my neighbor & i silently laughed to each other & rolled our eyes... i thought he was with her, but he apparently was in the middle of robbing our 2nd story neighbor... my deduction is that he was coughing to signal to someone else still inside the flat, and that the plan was for him to go outside & signal when someone was entering the building... i think my 3rd story neighbor caught them as they had just broken in. he was still in the hall with an accomplice inside the flat (she says she got the firm impression he had been speaking to someone inside the open flat door)... so in his panic, not only did he have to get away from HER, then WE came in... the fucking guy must have pissed himself! she says she actually asked him if he was alright on our front stoop cos she thought he was having a seizure... i mean, it's not funny ha ha funny but very weird funny... then the fucker went back inside cos she came back less than 10 minutes later with a newspaper and says she saw him coming back down the stairs AGAIN... the dick apparently broke open our front door a 2nd time after she closed it behind him!

well, here's where it gets not so funny, and how it ties in with the title of this post: apparently the couple in the flat that got robbed had a shitload of valuable jewelry... and i'm not talking semi-precious crap or paloma picasso silver blobbies, but bloody emeralds, rubies, sapphires, gold, etc., cos her parents are jewelers. the clincher is that they had all this super-valuable stuff in there and only ONE flimsy-ass little lock on the door! this ain't canada, fool. so while part of me is sorry for her, the other part of me is thinking 'you are a dumbass' and 'i hope this guy and his accomplice don't think everyone in this building is as rich and stupid as you are'... we are the only people with two locks on our door, and one is a deadbolt - you better believe this was my first course of action with the landlord the very day we moved in. so the front door lock which was waffety anyway got replaced and reinforced somewhat first thing monday morning, overseen by yours truly... even though the robbed couple said they were gonna deal with it, i knew they weren't going to do jack shit until they got their insurance crap straightened out and contacted every pawn shop in the area. so i lost 3.5 hours pay but at least i ain't afraid to leave the building.

my 3rd story neighbor and i had to give testimony to the cops and look at pictures and stuff. it was pretty futile I think; our descriptions of the perp didn't give them enough hits in their database to even pull up any pictures... this is stupid: if you get less than 12 matches, it shows you NONE. well, it could be one of those 12 people, right? and that's why I couldn't go to london on sunday and hang with the homegirls. oh, meh. off to make rice and beans.

last night I brought home a fantastic solid oak g-plan sideboard - for free! freecycle rules!

come on friday! we're gonna see the guy i got it from's comedy troupe (yes it's a troupe) and have some dinner and drinks... nice.

oh, and that whole stupid project i was overseeing at the council... it got cancelled at the last minute. after all that hassle for 2 weeks. the only reason i extended my contract. i could beat someone to death with a cricket bat but what's the use?

tuesday 8th march, 2005


this is my last week at the county council and already it's been a gauntlet of draconian misery... and i only showed up at noon on monday! come on friday, when i leave at noon forever! oh, the pain, the pain... without going into too much detail, anything and everything that could go wrong with the tidy little 'project' they sprang on me 2 weeks ago is. from the council having NO portable projection screens to the commissary's chef going on holiday this week, any little hurdle that could pop up now is. oh, and the temp that was covering for the girl who's on holiday (and whose job i am already doing anyway) vanished into ether on the premise of accepting a full-time job. so i'm basically PA to three people until wednesday. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckity FUCK it sucks!!!!! all i can do is be late and hide in the handicapped toilet more often.

oh, apologies to anyone i sent KISS (that's Kids In Satan's Service, remember?) lyrics to by text yesterday; i was sitting on a box of arch lever folders in the toilet trying desperately to remind myself that there is life beyond the walls of the local government gulag. help me spock, help me.......



dahdah dah dah dah dah dah dahdah DAH dah...

saturday 5th march, 2005


i remember this feeling... my hair smells of smoke, my throat is hoarse from yelling over music and i can't sit up straight from head pain. mmm, yeah, it's called a hangover i think. me & barb & emma & suey sampled a selection of mostly trappist ales at the alwyne last night and, stupid me, didn't put on enough of a booze sponge earlier in the day sampling boro market freebies and now i am suffering for it. oh well, derry was kind enough to make me a toasted cheese sandwich and i even had a coke (the yearly one i allow myself when i am not using it to take rust off of bicycles).

on the train back from victoria station i had to run away into another car from the horrible blondes who had been out drinking themselves and thought they would sit across from me and (literally) compare the orangeness of their fake tans. no thanks! so i found myself sitting near some very interesting young people from albania who provided thoroughly entertaining and amusing dialogue all the way to brighton. they were a bright, fun bunch and i was thankful to have them along for the ride - a few of them had been living and studying abroad in places ranging from sweden, the US and the UK. their comparisons of experiences were quite eye-opening. i especially enjoyed one of the more well-travelled males explaining why we need water filters for drinking water to one of his less experienced female friends... he explained it very simplistically but with such a serious, convincing tone that i am sure she ran out this morning and bought one first thing!

if i had been just a little drunker i'm sure i would have run up to them at the end of the ride and exclaimed "i love you guys!" and demanded hugs. thank god we left the bar when we did.

suey, did i pay you for those potato wedges?

tuesday 1st march, 2005


about two weeks ago, a green woodpecker appeared on the lawn outside the window where i've been temping in lewes. he only appears when it's grey and damp outside, and he picks at the turf in the same manner as the blackbirds... is he imitating them, looking for food? anyway, i named him "greenie" and whenever i see him outside i say "oh, greenie is back!" and the other people in the office (except for one nutty old lady who works for the library service and is an avid birder like me) humour me like i'm gonna produce a machine gun or something if they don't. fuck em, i only have a few more days there anyway. so greenie was outside my window today and it made me happy.

the next nature adventure i had was watching two squirrels playing on the wooden jungle-gym thingie that is also on the same lawn. they were tear-assing around & chasing each other like a couple of little kids. it was really fun to watch. which has nothing to do with albini's 'squirrel song' at all, except for the word 'squirrel'.

ah, who am i trying to kid? i got nothing.